Bill Gates dies in a car accident. He finds himself being sized up by God....
"Well, Bill, I`m really confused on this call. I m not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you helped society enormously by putting a computer in almost every home in America, yet you also created Windows 95. I`m going to do something I ve never done before. In your case, I m going to let you decide where you want to go."
"Well, what s the difference between the two?" Bill asks.
God says, "I m willing to let you visit both places briefly, if it will help your decision."
"Fine, but where should I go first?"
"I ll leave that up to you."
"Okay, then," says Bill. "Let me try Hell first."
So Bill goes to Hell. It s a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear waters and lots of beautiful women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun is shining, the temperature is perfect. He is very pleased.
"This is great!" he tells God. "If this is Hell, I REALLY want to see Heaven!"
"Fine," says God, and off they go.
Heaven is a place high in the clouds, with angels drifting about, playing harps and singing. It s nice, but not as enticing as Hell. Bill thinks for a quick minute and decides.
"Hmm. I think I d prefer Hell," he tells God.
"Fine," replies God. "As you desire."
So Bill Gates goes to Hell. Two weeks later, God decides to check on the late billionaire to see how he is doing in Hell. When he gets there, he finds Bill shackled to a wall, screaming amidst hot flames in a dark cave, being burned and tortured by demons.
"How s everything going?" he asks Bill.
Bill responds, his voice filled with anguish and disappointment, "This is awful! This is nothing like the Hell I visited two weeks ago! I can t believe this is happening! What happened to that other place, with the beaches and the beautiful women playing in the water?"
"Oh ... that was the SCREENSAVER."
Email Heights
HEIGHT OF REPETITION: Forwarding an email to someone and receiving the same email forwarded back to you by someone in the receiving chain.
Computer Viruses
OPRAH WINFREY VIRUS: Your 1.3gb hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80mb and then slowly expands back to 1.3gb.AT&T VIRUS: Every three minutes it tells you what great service you are getting.MCI VIRUS:
Project Manager!
A tourist walked into a pet shop and was looking at the animals on display. While he was there, another customer walked in and said to the shopkeeper, "I`ll have a C monkey please."
Steam engine !
This story is set during the early part of this century, when steam trains were still commonplace.
India's 2009 General Election Delivers A Surprise Outcome
Contrary to exit poll findings and widespread expectations of a closely fought race, India's ruling Congress Party - formally the Indian National Congress - and its allies won a clear victory in the
Itemized billing!
There was an engineer who had an exceptional gift for fixing all things mechanical. After serving his company loyally for over 30 years, he happily retired. Several years later the company
Kindly propose !
Dave took Mary out for a romantic dinner where conversation
The leader
It applies
The writer and his art
It was a holiday. But before I would enjoy the mood, I was disturbed by an inexplicable wave of thought.I could not make out what it was. Sudddenly I remembered Rahul, my bosom frend; also my
Three-year-old Rishikesh’s life was rudely cut short due to an Open Manhole in Mira Bhayandar
